Agency Over Anger
"A cunning part of [Satan’s] strategy is to dissociate anger from agency, making us believe that we are victims of an emotion that we cannot control."
Lynn G. Robbins, “Agency and Anger,”
Growing up I had a very happy and good childhood. I come from a family of loving parents who loved the Lord and were good people. As a child I never gave to much thought about the amount of tension or anger that we had in our home. After I was married and began to have kids I realized that I came from a home where uncontrolled anger sometimes took a toll. One of the things that made me realize this was noticing how I struggled to control my temper. Then after my divorce while I was living with my parents I have come to notice this uncontrolled anger is something we all need to work on in my family.
Lynn G. Robbins, described how Satan creeps into our homes through anger and hostility. "He damages and often destroys families within the walls of their own homes. His strategy is to stir up
anger between family members. Satan is the “father of contention, and he stirreth up the hearts of men to contend with anger, one with another” (3 Ne. 11:29; emphasis added). (Agency and Anger) This talk really got me thinking about how I can prevent my children from continuing this devastating pattern.
Lynn G. Robbins suggests one way to control our anger is through accountability. He describes it perfectly when he said, "No one makes us mad. Others don’t make us angry. There is no force involved. Becoming angry is a conscious choice, a decision; therefore, we can make the choice not to become angry. We choose!" To often we blame others for our anger or for "loosing our temper" when the reality is we are accountable. When we are accountable we enpower ourselves to make a change. We cannot change this behavior if we don't believe we have the power and control to do so.
I know this has helped me in noticing and wanting to change. When I first noticed that my father struggles with anger issues, I was a bit judgy and knew I didn't want to be like him. I now realize that I suffer from the same weakness. I am grateful for this awareness because it has taken me on a path of seeking change. And now I can teach my children the important connection of agency and anger, and how Satan uses it to bring a family down. I hope this will help them to control their anger and stop the pattern of anger in our family.
"Understanding the connection between agency and anger is the first step in eliminating it from our lives. We can choose not to become angry."
Lynn G. Robbins, “Agency and Anger,” Ensign, May 1998,80
Lynn G. Robbins, “Agency and Anger,”
Growing up I had a very happy and good childhood. I come from a family of loving parents who loved the Lord and were good people. As a child I never gave to much thought about the amount of tension or anger that we had in our home. After I was married and began to have kids I realized that I came from a home where uncontrolled anger sometimes took a toll. One of the things that made me realize this was noticing how I struggled to control my temper. Then after my divorce while I was living with my parents I have come to notice this uncontrolled anger is something we all need to work on in my family.
Lynn G. Robbins, described how Satan creeps into our homes through anger and hostility. "He damages and often destroys families within the walls of their own homes. His strategy is to stir upanger between family members. Satan is the “father of contention, and he stirreth up the hearts of men to contend with anger, one with another” (3 Ne. 11:29; emphasis added). (Agency and Anger) This talk really got me thinking about how I can prevent my children from continuing this devastating pattern.
Lynn G. Robbins suggests one way to control our anger is through accountability. He describes it perfectly when he said, "No one makes us mad. Others don’t make us angry. There is no force involved. Becoming angry is a conscious choice, a decision; therefore, we can make the choice not to become angry. We choose!" To often we blame others for our anger or for "loosing our temper" when the reality is we are accountable. When we are accountable we enpower ourselves to make a change. We cannot change this behavior if we don't believe we have the power and control to do so.
I know this has helped me in noticing and wanting to change. When I first noticed that my father struggles with anger issues, I was a bit judgy and knew I didn't want to be like him. I now realize that I suffer from the same weakness. I am grateful for this awareness because it has taken me on a path of seeking change. And now I can teach my children the important connection of agency and anger, and how Satan uses it to bring a family down. I hope this will help them to control their anger and stop the pattern of anger in our family.
"Understanding the connection between agency and anger is the first step in eliminating it from our lives. We can choose not to become angry."
Lynn G. Robbins, “Agency and Anger,” Ensign, May 1998,80
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